The Worst Party is Still a Party: On Love Actually
on day two of christmas movie week, we go to the worst party in the world
welcome to Christmas Movie Week here at griefbacon. It’s what it sounds like: Each day this week, there’s a post about a Christmas movie or movies, by the broadest definition of christmas movies. You’ve probably heard of this one.
The thing about parties is that most of the time they’re bad. Most parties are terrible. Love Actually is a party, which you can tell because there are too many people in it and all of them are yelling at each other and everyone is doing something very stupid to try to get somebody else’s attention. You’ve been to a bad party, because it’s very difficult to make it to adulthood without going to a bad party, so you can remember what a bad party feels like, but just in case you’re having trouble remembering, I’ll remind you: It feels like Richard Curtis’s 2003 blockbuster Christmas movie Love Actually.
Love Actually is an overcrowded party at the house of someone you barely know full of the worst people you’ve ever met. Love Actually is the movie version of showing up at party where the only person you know is the host and discovering that every single one of your exes is also there. Love Actually is a party where you are a different amount of drunk or high than everybody else and yet for some reason you can’t leave and instead you have to just sit there while the ice in your drink dies pitifully and one more stranger on way too much cocaine tells you how money works. Love Actually is when someone you thought might be a new friend invites you to a party and you show up in a nice shiny dress carrying a nice drinkable bottle of wine and then it turns out that every single other person at the party works at the same company, or is exes with one another, or both. You go to a party with a friend because that friend needs someone to come with her so she can run into someone she has a crush on without looking desperate, and then she goes off to flirt with her crush and you are left on your own at the party, and someone you don’t know comes up to you and starts talking to you too close and very loudly about their divorce, and everyone here is way too obsessed with Christmas, everyone has a grievance and everyone needs to tell you about the grievance, and everyone has a big theory about love, and everyone has a very stupid idea, and everyone is committing way too hard to the bit, and someone keeps bringing up 9/11 for some reason even though there is absolutely no reason to bring up 9/11 at a holiday party. If you’ve never had any kind of social anxiety I am so happy for you and thrilled about how well your life must be going, but if, for some reason, you want to know what social anxiety is like, you could just watch Richard Curtis’s 2003 blockbuster Christmas movie Love Actually.