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Here we are, 2021 almost at a close, and I am through the worst of what has happened to me in the past few years. Settled in a way I haven’t been since 2018. How can it make sense that change happens so slowly but all at once? I’m actually happy, but there is a nostalgia in looking back at the pain. I’m in the better days I prayed for but they are not at all what I dreamed.

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Oh Helena. You are a goddess with your writing.

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Yowza, what a perfect essay to wake up to on the third day of the month. Reminds me of the feeling of the Tom Waits tune of the same name, from _The Black Rider_. Definitely haunted.

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