Cathartic. I broke into a wail loud enough to alert the dog. I've been "borrowing" your writing for years (ok, you made free but it felt like I was stealing, so I'm being kind to myself), but today was the day I had to stop being an idiot and subscribe. Your work has been brilliant the day I stumbled on it and it is one of those George Bailey gifts that I wish the world appreciated more. My roof started leaking three days ago and I have been unemployed for nearly a year. I live alone with a sick old dog and my family has passed, most of them in December in fact. With my bipolar depression all these 2020 events have had an extra special sheen to them. Your writing this helps me find a path through. Thank you so much for this, and all of it.
I opened and read this out loud to my roomate while we baked a variation of that crazy mushroom lasagna recipe you shared in your pizza essay (we used rigatoni instead of lasagna and a shit ton of vegan cheese in place of the regular cheese - still slaps). I was telling her about where I found the lasagne recipe as she was putting it in the oven, coincidentally when I received this email. "Oh she just sent one out - let's read it" I said. Little did I know that I would cry almost the entire time, choking on the words and ruining my makeup though I wasn't really going anywhere for it to be perfect in the first place.
Helena, you really know how to capture the in between feelings, the feelings that hang in the air like the smell of a childhood home, the ones you never knew you felt until they step on your toes. Thank you for your words, I'm looking forward to to see what you have to share in 2021.
Maybe the best damn thing I've ever read about Christmas.
Cathartic. I broke into a wail loud enough to alert the dog. I've been "borrowing" your writing for years (ok, you made free but it felt like I was stealing, so I'm being kind to myself), but today was the day I had to stop being an idiot and subscribe. Your work has been brilliant the day I stumbled on it and it is one of those George Bailey gifts that I wish the world appreciated more. My roof started leaking three days ago and I have been unemployed for nearly a year. I live alone with a sick old dog and my family has passed, most of them in December in fact. With my bipolar depression all these 2020 events have had an extra special sheen to them. Your writing this helps me find a path through. Thank you so much for this, and all of it.
This was what I needed to read this morning.
I opened and read this out loud to my roomate while we baked a variation of that crazy mushroom lasagna recipe you shared in your pizza essay (we used rigatoni instead of lasagna and a shit ton of vegan cheese in place of the regular cheese - still slaps). I was telling her about where I found the lasagne recipe as she was putting it in the oven, coincidentally when I received this email. "Oh she just sent one out - let's read it" I said. Little did I know that I would cry almost the entire time, choking on the words and ruining my makeup though I wasn't really going anywhere for it to be perfect in the first place.
Helena, you really know how to capture the in between feelings, the feelings that hang in the air like the smell of a childhood home, the ones you never knew you felt until they step on your toes. Thank you for your words, I'm looking forward to to see what you have to share in 2021.
Happy New Year and all the best,
Savannah